Happy Birthday, Beaneet!

Happy Birthday, Beaneet, o brother-from-another-leather. 3 years, big guy!

Thank you for your unconditional support. Otherwise I would've had no option but to hit rock bottom. Apologies for not having opened a Facebook account for you though. (Basic rights, I know, I know, if that total retard-of-a-Gujju-kid on the 2nd floor can have one, why can't you... I know.)

For the past three years, you have always been there beneath, Beaneet. You got kicked around, thrown on the bed, punched, drenched in water, cola, whisky. but not a sound from you.....

Beaneet, some might call you spineless, but I know that you do have a lot of balls.
(That's how you survived last month's 115-kilo body slam from yours truly, remember?) They'll always keep you from tearing apart.

Even though you choose to be glum, all by yourself, we still treat you as a part of our lives. See, now without giving a flying f**k, I resorted to wishing you a happy birthday on a Facebook status update (without using the words 'manuf**tured' or 'p**chase date') Also, I'm not sure you'll be getting the enough amount of likes or not - guess you should have been conceived with some whiskers or a wagging tail ,eh?!

Sure I may have compromised my stance against vain, irrational behaviour that I see many out there succumb to (like clicking a selfie in a room full of humans well-equipped with photo-clicking skills)....but hey, I work in an ad agency, remember??!
:D

Hang in there, bud. Hope the next year may be your fourth, the year after that your fifth, and so on....(you get the drill). Cheers.